Untitled (2020)
The skin is the largest organ in the body. It protects us; Holds us together. Literally lets us know how we’re feeling. So, what happens when our insides violate this boundary?
Where is the line between the body and the self? Our bodies have much more control over us than we have of them. Our bodily processes, the large majority of them at least, happen without our consent. The body and the self are separate entities.
In addition to exploring these questions, this piece challenges the boundaries of what a body – a human body – is. The body is never supposed to function in this way. It is unnatural, the result of surgical intervention. Does this make the body any less human?
Two years ago, my body decided to start attacking my colon as though it were a foreign object. In April 2018, I underwent an operation to remove my entire large intestine. This operation also included the formation of an ileostomy – a procedure where the small intestine is pulled through the abdominal wall and then attached to the outside of the abdomen. The intestine is different from the external components of the body. It produces mucus, moves at its own will, and has no nerve endings. I’ve never really thought of my stoma as being a part of my insides – my intestines are simply intestines, but that one-inch piece on the outside of my body is called Stella. Yet she also doesn’t register as being a part of my outer body either. I talk to her, fight with her, worry about her – I just view her as being separate from “me”.
This video probes viewers to consider some of the questions posed above. Firstly, areas of the skin left scarred by surgery are shown. Then the attention turns to the stoma. Examining how the stoma moves – both with and independent of the body – highlights the fact that this thing is out of my control but still affected by my conscious movements. I chose to pay particular attention to movements caused by my breathing and heartbeat – highlighting other bodily processes which are essential to a living body. In terms of installation, I felt this video required a smaller, more intimate display, and chose to use a portable projector allowing for a 50-inch screen projection.
